(720) 900-4269
Chris.Hamlin@inthemeantime.band
Legal Notice — In The Meantime
Filed and immediately misplaced by The Daily Flannel Legal Department (Est. 1993, Dissolved 1994, Reformed 2002)
This Legal Notice (“The Notice,” “The Thing We Were Told To Have,” or “That Long Paragraph No One Reads”) applies to all interactions with the Denver-based 90s cover band In The Meantime, its members, affiliates, roadies, tambourine enthusiasts, and any spiritual entities accidentally summoned during performances. By attending a show, reading about the band, or humming ”Closing Time” within city limits, you automatically agree to the terms below and forfeit any right to claim you “didn’t know what you were getting into.”
All riffs, solos, and awkward between-song banter performed by In The Meantime are the intellectual property of the band, except for the parts that are legally someone else’s (which is most of it). Any attempt to record, redistribute, or emotionally replicate said performances may result in a cease-and-desist letter written on the back of a Chili’s napkin.
Furthermore, all lyrical mispronunciations, key changes made in panic, and extended outros “because Bobby was feeling it” are considered original artistic expressions protected under the Grunge Fair Use Doctrine of 1994.
In The Meantime assumes zero responsibility for:
Spontaneous flashbacks to your high school breakup.
Emotional damage caused by our hauntingly accurate “Black Hole Sun.”
Loss of voice, footwear, or dignity during group singalongs.
Bar tabs exceeding $100 during our two-set minimum.
Flannel rash, nostalgia whiplash, or unexplainable attraction to mid-tempo guitar riffs.
Attending a live performance constitutes acceptance that some part of your soul will now permanently smell like cigarette smoke and cheap beer.
Any statements attributed to Kurt Cobain, living or otherwise, are entirely fictional, spiritually motivated, and legally unenforceable. All mentions of praise, haunting, or spectral approval are provided “as-is,” with no warranties express or implied.
The Daily Flannel may, from time to time, print flattering lies about In The Meantime. These should not be interpreted as factual, binding, or even sober.
Under Section 90s-Rule-7B, any individual named Chris attending a show is hereby deputized as an honorary band member for the duration of the event. Said Chrises may be asked to hold cables, harmonize awkwardly, or deliver spontaneous Cornell-style wails. In The Meantime is not responsible for any emotional resonance or spontaneous band formation resulting therefrom.
All venues hosting In The Meantime agree to provide:
1. A functioning electrical outlet not controlled by a light switch.
2. A fog machine that doesn’t smell like burning regret.
3. Enough space on stage for Brandon's guitar stance, which legally qualifies as “wide.”
Failure to comply may result in the band performing a legally binding acoustic set in the parking lot.
This Notice shall be governed by the laws of the State of Colorado, as well as the unwritten bylaws of late-night dive bars. Any disputes will be resolved in the parking lot behind the venue, under the supervision of the nearest bouncer, or through a best-of-three “Closing Time” sing-off.
In The Meantime shall not be held liable for any cancellations or performance interruptions due to acts of God, acts of Scott Weiland, broken amps, broken hearts, or spontaneous audience mosh pits caused by emotional resonance.
This Legal Notice may be updated at any time, especially if we get a real lawyer or a cease-and-desist from Third Eye Blind. Updates will take effect immediately upon being scribbled on the back of a setlist and forgotten in the van.
By engaging with In The Meantime in any capacity — digital, emotional, or spiritual — you hereby acknowledge that:
You are willingly participating in a nostalgia event of great personal risk.
You understand that flannel may never go out of style.
You accept that Chris’s impressions may bring you to tears, and that’s between you and your therapist.
Failure to agree to these terms does not exempt you from them; it just means you probably don’t own a Pearl Jam CD.